Saturday, April 2, 2011

Crap story I wrote long time back

She didn’t want to go the party. Her mood was as jubilant as thunderous clouds and the last thing she wanted was to fake a smile and make polite talk when her very world was falling to pieces around her. But then, she didn’t want people to call her a coward, either. She wasn’t the one to hide, or the one to lick her wounds in private. Rather, she would rub salt on them, so as to keep the pain fresh. Pain made her more determined. He had hurt her. But she wouldn’t let him know that.



So she prepared to go. Clothes were never a hassle before but tonight she wanted to look perfect. Like nothing could touch her. Black was dispensed off as being the color of mourning, and red somehow seemed vampish enough to be worn by a C grade Bollywood starlet – and there will be plenty of them tonight.  Yellow would be faking it too much and white was too demure. And so she picked purple, the elegant, regal, purple...mysterious like inky nights and as enigmatic as the royals who preferred it. 

And when she arrived, one couldn’t help but notice her. She held her own among the glittering, titillating crowd. Her enchanting smile seemed even more enchanting tonight – if that was even possible...and the purple gown gave her a magical, ethereal aura...

He swallowed his scotch in one quick gulp and stole a glance at her. She looked even more invincible, still alive, enticing. After everything. Had he ever really known her? 

Their eyes met and her smile turned mocking for a second, so brief that only he could see it...and suddenly he felt uncomfortable...

32 comments:

The Sage said...

not crap!! it is nice... would love to read the sequel...

Ekta said...

me too :-)

Writer Steve? (hmm still not sure) said...

I would not say crap; just like everything i write it needs polish, also we need more. Please.

os1123 said...

Lovely! Such a beautiful beginning that leaves me hungry for more!

Rain Girl said...

@The Sage: not sure if there will be one.

Rain Girl said...

@Ekta: :) you are too sweet... dunno, never thought about a sequel..

Rain Girl said...

@Steve: yeah, I wrote it in a hurry ... and decided to post it without the polish :P

thanks for your comment :)

Rain Girl said...

@os1123: and I love your comment! Thank you so, so much! :)

Ekta said...

yaar issmein ab sweet ki kya baat hai? joh laga voh likha....

nothing is sugar coated dear :-)

blunt edges said...

Like how the story starts with the girl being uncomfortable and ends with guy reciprocating!

It's a lot of stuff, but certainly not crap! :)

Rain Girl said...

@Blunt edges: ahaa.. glad to see you back here :D

and hehe maine to socha hi nahi tha.. about "how the story starts with the girl being uncomfortable and ends with guy reciprocating!" :P

parkhi nazar ;)

buyrift said...

WoW! this one great. . love it. .=0

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AmitL said...

Rain Girl-this was nice...and, like the rest, I wanted to ask @ a sequel..you write really well.Keep it up.:)

Rain Girl said...

@AmitL: thanks :) now will seriously think about sequel...

Anushka said...

I liked it! :) More, more, more!
Check out my blog? I'm from Bombay too!

http://www.bombaybubble.com/

Rain Girl said...

@Anushka : thanks for dropping by! saw your blog - its so inspiring! :D absolutely loved it :D

Jay said...

You described everything perfectly so I could see it happen in my head, bravo :D

Rain Girl said...

@Jay: Thank you so much for stopping by and loving the post.. :D will check your blog soon! :)

MysLykeMeeh said...

whew!!!

Mysterious, vivid and powerful. The flow of your words entertained my inmost interest. You can create a novel out of this.

It's not crap, my goodness...

Haven't read from you for a while and I'm glad I visited here. Write more...

I kinda like the girl in your story...i like how you build up her character.

Rain Girl said...

@MysLykeMeeh: heyy! long time :D and thanks so, so much! that is such a sweet n inspiring comment.. am flattered :P

xoxo

SoShYgAl..BME said...

NiceOne...seriously..!!!
i love it..!!
Chk out my story too...i want comments from a pro like you..!!

Rain Girl said...

@SoShYgAl..BME thank you so so much! and welcome to my blog :)

will check your blog definately - am just a bit busy right now - as soon as I get free - yours will be the first blog I will check :)

commited to life said...

serves him right
humph!!

hapi said...

Hi Rain Girl, Nice blog! How to add the Glitter Effect Mouse Pointer to your Blog

Lipsy said...

Hey you write so well...I usually don't read long posts but this kept me engrossed from begining to end.
Much Love
would love to be friends
http://fashionquotient.blogspot.com

Tanvi said...

Nothing crap about it at all! Please write often :)

♥ from © tanvii.com

Rain Girl said...

@commited to life: lol, I love your reactions :*

Rain Girl said...

@Lipsy: thank you so much for this really sweet comment. And yes, let's be friends!! :D

Rain Girl said...

@Tanvii: Thank you so much!:) Do drop by more often...

Jyoti_manasi said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jyoti_manasi said...

Hi..I am new blogger..liked your story..would love to read further.

Rain Girl said...

@Jyoti: Thank you so much. :) I have been a bit busy with life off late, and facing a lack of ... inspiration.. hopefully, something will be up soon :)

and welcome here!